A Single Life

A Single Life

March 2012

It seems only appropriate that the first entry on a blog belonging to the “Ministry Coordinator for Single Women” is about singleness.

After all, I have been single for almost 15 years, so I should know something about dealing with that label if nothing else.

I am actually comfortable with it, though it seems difficult for some of my friends to accept.  These are just a few examples of the questions/comments I’ve fielded from well-meaning people over the years:

…..”So, you’ve been single how long?”  This is said with the same inflection one uses to ask “What is that on your face?”

…..”So, why do you think you’re still single?” I have many witty comebacks to this….none of which I’ve ever used.

…..I’ve had well-meaning friends tell me they were worried about me, because I’m not getting any younger.  I guess this is preferable to “You’re no spring chicken!”

…..I’ve had someone tell me that I was “really weird” for choosing not to date for five years when my kids were younger.  Poor social skills are also “really weird”.

…..If I am being quizzed by a Christian the question almost always turns to “Do you feel called to be single?”

The truth is, being single this many years has not been my goal; following God has been.

The days have gone by and the years have accumulated while I have been living the life in front of me and learning to depend on Him for everything.


And He has made life full, and sweet.

While I don’t feel that marriage is out of the question, until I am with someone I can share my life and faith with, I do feel called to be single – today.

So what does that mean?

It means, today, I take what I’ve been given – two incredible kids, wonderful family, friends and neighbors, and a  job that I love,  just to name a few blessings – and I live this life to the fullest today.  Creating a home for my children that is full of joy and traditions, today.  Having a career, today.  Nurturing fulfilling relationships with family and friends, today. Having a church home, today. Making plans for my future, today.  Cultivating interests and hobbies, today.  Basically, living all of life that there is to have outside of a marriage relationship, today.   And trusting God with my heart and happiness.

Isn’t that what we all are called to do?

Honestly?  I believe I live a blessed life. Our home is joyful.  My life is fulfilling and full of love – from friends and family and from Him.

I think some people look at the life of a single person and see only what is obviously missing – a spouse.  When in reality, “missing” a spouse isn’t a tragedy….missing out on a life with God is.

I am a mother.  A sister.  A daughter.  A friend.   A writer and speaker.  A child of God.

And I am single.

Not because He hasn’t blessed me, but because He has- with this life, today.


In Him was life, and the life was the light of men.  John 1:4




What about you?  How do you address others’ opinions or comments about your “single” status?   (go to the top of the post and click on “comments”)


5 Replies to “A Single Life”

  1. My favorite part: I think some people look at the life of a single person and see only what is obviously missing – a spouse. When in reality, ”missing” a spouse isn’t a tragedy….missing out on a life with God is.

    I was listening to Tony Robbins he said “if you tell a negative story, that story becomes you…. My new story posted on fb recently:
    I am a professional woman (licensed insurance agent, teacher, floral designer,artist, designer, black belt, volunteer, small group leader, sister, daughter, aunt, friend) and a mother of 2 amazing boys raising them with God and in God to be well educated, responsible, businessmen, husbands and fathers they can possibly be….

    It has taken me a long time but with A LOT of help from Hope…Ginger and Greg I have realized relationships (with men) were my idol, I couldn’t live without one, well that has changed. Yes I have struggled. But I have decided to make other relationships with friends, family, co-workers, etc.. If God wants me single for a while that is fine I accept. Only He knows my path and my plan…Show me Your will for my life, my eyes are wide open and I am listening!

    Thank you Ginger for all your help, you have inspired my life in ways you will never know!!!!!

  2. Thank you ladies for sharing. I have been single for 15 years as well and have heard the same questions and concerns. Love to see the heart of other women who love the Lord.

  3. Hey Ginger, Happy Mother’s Day (just a few minutes late)! I just saw this. Great post. It is amazing, just as you are. What an inspiration you continue to be. I think I posed atleast one of those questions to YOU… I love the peace that it brings when I know the Lord is in control and that I am allowing Him to show me His way for my life. When I am controlling it, well everything gets “confusing”. I enjoy what He has done for me and I can only imagine, what He has in store.
    May we all continue to be blessed while looking up…xo

  4. I’m 30 and have never been married. I’ve often asked myself how I could possibly be single. Friends have asked too. And people at church. And those I meet on the street.

    It’s this phenomenon. I get it.

    I wish I had some answers. Some real ones on why. It hasn’t been my choice. Although, in a way it has, because I’ve refused to be in a relationship unless God was the one bringing it to me. That hasn’t happened yet.

    Thanks for writing this.

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